i like being a mom.
i have nursed ida probably 4 times since she hit the sack around 8:30. i don't really know how much she is getting, it is the kind of nurse that happens when she wakes up like a little lamb, with closed eyes and her mouth wide open searching for me. sometimes its for milk, sometimes its just for soothing. i guess i have turned myself into a feeding/soothing machine. some would say its a terribly bad habit.
she sleeps with me too. some would also say that is unnatural, unsafe and the worst habit to get into....
i love nursing ida and i love that ida sleeps with me. my experience as a mother has been amazingly enriched by these two things. when eli was little i did the same thing. i have cherished memories of snuggling him, watching him sleep, holding him close. so, so dear to me.
these kids are little just once. ida is growing up too fast. it brings me to tears to think she is almost one and i feel like i have mentally "missed" this entire year because it has been too hectic and stressful and unsure.
i guess that is why, in the darkness of the night, when i do not sleep because she wants to nurse/be soothed, it's o.k.. or if i do not get a 12 hour sweet slumbering sleep, that is also alright. because, i like being a mom. i like to see that she is alright and happy. i don't mind sacrificing my wants for her needs. besides, she won't nurse forever and they won't be sleeping with me when they are 19, so why fuss when this is all part of the experience for me. in the grand scheme of things, it's a short, fleeting time when she is little and just needs to be taken care of by her mom.
we all do it differently. i hope you are enjoying your experience.
7 comments:
That's how I mothered our four. I loved every minute of it. I still love snuggling with Daniel who secretly slips into our bed in the middle of the night.
So sweet. I always wished I could of had some of the those moments. Three babies in the bed doesn't work out to well. Enjoy. The time flies.
Love it! You are an awesome mom! They change way too fast!
You're so lucky your kids are snugglers. Both my girls won't sleep anywhere but by themselves in their bed or crib and they've been like that from day 1. They grow up way to fast. Hope you're enjoying the new ward/house. We miss you guys.
She's such a cherub! (did i spell that right? it looks so wierd.)
I'm SO glad you got to be a mama again and that you're loving every minute. it's so wonderful
That's a wonderful perspective, and so true Jessica.n By the way, I love Ida! She seems so happy and content:)
i love this. it made me cry. what a positive way to see your mothering.
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