Saturday, June 26, 2010

current thoughts: the winds of change

big happy girl
on the way
cabiny cabin

we just got back from las vegas and st. george as you know. we went down to witness the wedding of our nephew jason. he got married in the st. george temple. we were with him as he got dressed that morning in his tuxedo. i noticed he was calm and quiet. he got suited up and said he was on his way to pick up his bride. i thought that was perfectly romantic. they drove themselves to the temple. we showed up a bit later, made our way to the sealing room, it was full of people that loved them. the sealing was very nice. the thoughts that stood out to me were something to the effect of "having rejoicing and joy in your children". james and denise {jasons parents} were so collected and calm. tears were shed but in general they were very composed. i asked denise the next day how they held it together. {c.j. and i came to the conclusion that when eli and ida marry it will be like a looney tunes episode and someone will have to use a spatula to scrape us off the floor. we will surely be the biggest ball babies you've ever seen, guaranteed}. anyho, denise on the other hand, said she felt great at the wedding. she said she felt like they had done their job as parents. she felt confident in jason. she felt like he was a good kid, mature, responsible, and a contributing member of society that will rise to the occasion of being a married man and being on his own. no looking back. she stated that that was their goal as parents and they felt like it had been achieved. it was great advice and thoughts for me to hear. it was an occasion of transition and change for their family. not a sad, worrisome time but a joyous time. as it should be.

when i came home from our trip and went out to visit my parents. i was struck by the FOR SALE sign at their front gates. wow, selling the homestead. bigger, better plans. new phase of life. a change for them, a change for the family.

eli finished grade 2 yesterday. he came home with an excellent report card. his art folder was priceless. his journal entries were sweet. he felt sad to leave his teacher and best friend connor but was ready for the summer. remember the last day of school? so surreal.

i went to donate breast milk yesterday for a friend. even though i am still nursing ida, my efforts with the pump were unsuccessful. i was empty. it was a sign. i realized that ida was not really getting anything either and it was time to pack it in. i talked with ida and told her we were all done and when she would attempt to nurse or get on my lap i would say "all done, all gone", then i would distract her with a book or a game or a drink. at one point we even said a little prayer and asked that she would be comforted and that it would be a easy transition for the both of us. she went to bed fine but woke in the night. c.j. brought her in to me. for a good hour i held her as she rolled and tossed and turned my arms, trying to suckle. she didn't cry. she didn't fuss. she just whimpered occasionally and looked at me perplexed. it made me sad, however during this time i had an overwhelming feeling of love. she handled it so well. i just held her and kissed her and told her how much i loved her. i told her she was being such a good girl and that she was doing so well through this transition. she finally went back to sleep and i knew we would be just fine. today my left boob is doing a dolly parton impersonation, the other side went on-strike awhile ago. i am hurting like nobodys business. ida has come to me several times for a hug and a squeeze. a couple of times i have reminded her that it's ''all gone" and she just hops off my lap to go play. this is it. i loved nursing her. on with life. i feel so blessed to have her. i love her so much.

we are looking again this summer for a house. i am not really sure where we will end up. it is stressful and frustrating. only time will tell.

so much going on. i drove to my parents cabin today for some down time. it's almost midnight. the kids are sawing logs. my boob is ON FIRE. mercy. i am going to go sew.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010


we are home. pulled into the house around 2:30 am. the flight was fine, the kids did great.
the house smelled funny when i opened the door to come in. stale, stagnant air i guess. we had such a great time on our trip. eli and c.j. came down with strep throat yesterday. today they both saw the doctor and got medicated. it is nice and cool here compared to vegas/st. george. i have the window open and it is raining out. it feels so good. eli has 2 days of school left. summer is here. this year is 1/2 over. this time last year we were packing our house to move. we are looking at that option again. searching, considering, praying. it is hard timing a move when some important details are out of your hands.

oh, there's some thunder, nice. i like that sound. it reminds me of tennessee.

do you know how amazing snow canyon is?

paring down. i have boxes to go through in my basement.

i feel a bit tired today. should be fit tomorrow.

Saturday, June 19, 2010

holy catch up batman

every time we put sunglasses on ida she would pucker up her lips
"pump it up" bounce house. lots of sweaty fun
these two mean business, rollin' in their barbie jeep

more pirate eyes


3 stooges
on the lawn at dixie
old dorm room
while these two did this....
i did this...

intense wii bowling

wedding day

aarrrgh. idas new "smile". total pirate schtick.
c.j. & family
drinks after the wedding, 100+ degrees
reception goofiness

c.j. & mom
the happy couple

Friday, June 18, 2010


group shot at the first emerald pool in zion, ida sacked out.

elis family portrait he drew at school. he totally nailed it, ida totally has my lips...



driving to zion

sooooo. i left my cord for my DSLR at home and forgot the battery charger. sheesh, you're going on a holiday lady, get it together...

in short, we have been swimming, sweating, driving, laughing, hiking, appreciating, eating, loving. this post is light weight, will fill in soon. in the meantime, enjoy the camera phone pics, it's the best i can do.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

a vision of searsucker

we are getting ready to go on a little trip.

c.j.s nephew is getting married on the 19th in st. george, utah. i took a look at flights, found a sale on westjet, $89 each way. what a steal! we fly into las vegas on saturday, spend the week in vegas and st. george and come home on the 22nd. it's going to be great. i can't wait to see friends and family. i can't wait to spend some down time in st. george. i haven't spent any significant time there since i graduated from dixie college a million years ago. it's going to be good to reconnect with the town.

prepping for the trip has posed some challenges. c.j. is super swamped with work and deadlines so i am trying to get everything/everybody ready. i have been hitting the malls trying to find some thing for everyone to wear to the wedding. from holt renfrew to winners, no holds barred.

the other day i thought, "i want to find a searsucker suit for eli". it will be light weight and cool, perfect for the hot weather down there. but where to find one... i thought, "i am going to pop by a gymboree and ask if they have one kicking around their back-room from easter or something"... i had a clear picture of it in my mind. yup, that's what i am going to do. today i ended up at chinook center, rushing from place to place. i stopped at gymboree and looked at their sale rack. there it was, ONE GREY SEARSUCKER SUIT, SIZE 10. the jacket, pants and shorts. 80% off. how awesome is that? wait, how weird is that?!? i kept telling the lady i had a vision of finding this suit, she couldn't believe it. i got it home and tried it on eli. slightly too big... shoot how could this be??? it was meant to be!!! i called the store, they called around for me and located another jacket and pants at crossiron mills and placed it on hold. it was a true searsucker miracle. got it home, tried it on eli. perfect fit, perfect, perfect, perfect. watch out st. george, he's gunna look good.

i finally found an outfit for myself after wading through endless stores and racks and racks of sleeveless, too short, see-through, cut-out, strappy, skanky dresses that occupy 99% of women's stores these days. what a frustrating experience. where is the modesty people?? sheesh.

now i just need to tear c.j. away from his computer for 5 minutes so he can find a suit and we'll be ready to go! it's going to be hot and fun!

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

he smells like reid

it's a boy!

Sunday, June 6, 2010

bit of everything

elis shoe tying skills are unmatched, this is what i had to unscramble the other day
west edmonton mall carousel

walked by this condo sign the other day and giggled. any women who has given birth would never decide to live at "the royal crowning".
little john was born
ida + breakfast

bit o' morning reading
14th anniversary
uncle bruce passed
aunt yvonne @ the funeral
great grandma woods house
ida wood

significant things have happened in the last few weeks. an anniversary, a baby's birth and a death in the family.

*c.j. and i have been married for 14 years. i have to say we had a really nice, relaxed anniversary.

*sandra and chuck welcomed their 5th and last baby into their family. little john david saunders. i like the pic that chuck sent right after he was born {above}. he is so squishy and content looking. i'm here!!

*uncle bruce died. he was grandpa wood's sister yvonne's husband, but we called him uncle bruce. he was the most wonderfully interesting man. adventurous, adventurous, adventurous. he was a geologist and was a pioneer in the yukon. he flew helicopters, developed ski resorts, travelled the world and knew every crazy limerick and would recite them at all family gatherings. it was so sad to hear he had died. right in his own backyard pruning bushes. his funeral in taber was lovely, aunt yvonne was so cute and i am sure was blessed with comfort from above. they have lived in great grandma woods house since she passed in the late '80's. i honestly don't think i have been in that house since that time. i always have wanted to go snoop around the place just to think of old times and recollect. after the funeral, we walked across the street to the house, i took a picture of the place and walked up the driveway. lots of relatives where there, milling around, it was a beautiful day. i walked up the stairs and passed through the door and was stopped in my tracks. it smelled just like grandma. it was such a intense experience, i just couldn't move. i was frozen, the smell was so familiar and overpowering. i just expected to hear grandma shuffling around. i caught my dad's eye as he saw me stuck there in the entry and i shook my head with tears in my eyes. i eventually made my way in. her little kitchen, the living room, the tiny hallway and bedrooms. i looked at all the pictures and trinkets of aunt yvonne and uncle bruce's. family pictures, rocks and minerals, music and books. that is where i found the picture of grandma with her big smile {above}. i loved her so much.

i could only stay in the house for a few minutes, i felt slightly out of place as extended family began to fill the rooms and i felt too overwhelmed with emotion. i really just wanted to sit down and look around quietly for hours and hours. this experience took me off guard. it still moves me as i write this for some reason. i can't tell why, it was just so powerful.

that pretty much brings things up-to-date. on the horizon: my sister stacey, this very second, is waiting anxiously for a call from the hospital giving her the go ahead to come down and be induced. we all think she is having a girl. will let you know in my next entry. go dee go!